Congratulations to Dan Joyce, who in addition to having a wife to boss him around, now has a second daughter to start calling the shots. Pictured here, looking suspiciously blonde as compared to her father's black hair, Abigail Margaret Joyce was welcomed in to the world (by appointment) on May 12th. Results of the paternity test are still pending.
Still, good job Dan for kicking out another one, even if it does complete the Axis of Estrogen. Call me though...I can hook you up with some barely used Brat Dolls.
Of course, it wouldn't be right to send Abigail on her way without making her aware of her place in history. Indeed, lots of history had already been made on May 12th, most of it bloody. This includes the Battles of Lewes (1264), Charleston (1780), Venice (1862), Spotsylvania Court House (1864), Batoche (1885) and Kharkov II (1942). Adding to the gloom, the Lindburgh baby shows up, not so bouncy (1932), 1,500 Jews are sent to Auschwitz (1942), Luna 5 crashes in to the moon (1965), a freight train jumps the tracks in San Bernadino destroying 11 homes (1989), and the Riyhad compound bombings kill 26 (2003).
Bloody hell, how can I turn this around? Well on the good news front, William III of England starts a war with France (no really, that's always good news) (1689), the first official County cricket game was played (1890), the General Strike ends (1926), the Soviet Union lifts the blockade of Berlin (1949), Busch Stadium opens (1966) and 38 years later the Red Sox clinch the World Series there, Pink Floyd stage the first ever quadraphonic rock concert (1967), Ernie Banks hits his 500th dinger at Wrigley Field (1970), the Tate Modern Gallery opens (2000) and Justin Gatlin ties the world 100m record (2006).
A busy day for humanity, for better or worse. Let's throw in some birthdays:
Poet Edward Lear, top nurse Florence Nightingale, Pre-Raphaelite painter Gabriel Rossetti, crazy old coot Katherine Hepburn, Yankee wordsmith Yogi Berra, lounge composer Burt Bacharach, angry George Carlin, blockhead Ian Dury, high mileage singer Steve Winwood, the stroker Billy Squier, usual suspect Gabriel Byrne, Marsellus Wallace aka Ving Rhames, part-time Sheen Emilio Estevez, baby Stephen Baldwin, skateboard bazillionairre Tony Hawk, knockout Sofia Coppola, brick sh*thouse Jonah Lomu and juvenile comedy actor Jason Biggs.
Go out and make a name for yourself Abby.
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