…put it all together and you get your once-a-year opportunity to decide who’s going be annoying the league, giving the speeches, picking the teams, writing the blogs and bugging you for dues next year.
Everyone with aspirations for public office, an interest in the club or who just has a hard-on for democracy should attend, since it is your future being discussed. There are a million other clichés about why you need to get out and vote, but MTV already stole them all.
Any of you with (serious) issues you want to raise or bright ideas you want to put forward (and follow through on) are encouraged to contact me ahead of time so I can add you to the agenda.
Other highlights include:
· A review of the club’s financial statements (including naming names on who still owes us)
· One-million-and-one good ideas to raise money (and why they fail)
· The “who doesn’t have a job yet?” associate club rep. electathon
· A report from last years associate club reps. (blink and you miss it)
· Girls who are hot for a guy who exercises his prerogative
· By-law trivia bingo
· Your chance to say “I second that”, like you’re somebody
· “Proxy” jokes
…and many more back-room, political machinations.
One City Center is the location, and Tuesday Nov. 29th (next Tuesday) at 7pm is the designated time.
Choose or loose.
Grrrrr…..curse you MTV!
Thursday, November 17, 2005
Gimme an 'A', Gimme a 'G', Gimme an 'M'
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
I gots your jersey but I don't gots your money. How come?
At long last the first order of extra team jerseys is here, and I'm just aching to get them to you. But not before you've coughed up forty large.
Fix it with the button below, and meet me at Gritty's this Thursday @ 6:30 to complete the transaction (or you can pay me cash on the night, but e-mail me at least to let me know you're coming).
Fix it with the button below, and meet me at Gritty's this Thursday @ 6:30 to complete the transaction (or you can pay me cash on the night, but e-mail me at least to let me know you're coming).
Monday, November 14, 2005
Prize Patrol.
This past Saturday saw the 2005 Season lain to rest with the annual banquet, held at the Portland Harbor Hotel. Many thanks go to Jerry McQueeny for arranging the event, and give or take a few deadbeat members of the women’s team yet to pay, we may even have covered our costs. Hmmmm…..me thinks this Jerry fellow shows management potential.
Attendance at the banquet is usually a good barometer of the club’s fortunes, and if this year’s numbers are anything to go by, then 2006 looks set fair, with plenty of new faces to bolster those old and wizened ones of year’s past.
In addition to all the merriment, there were speeches made and awards awarded, both serious and not so much. For those of you unable to attend, or just too drunk to remember any of it (Spyder), I’ll try to recap for you here.
President, Fred Hayman, kicked off the proceedings with a few choice words about the high points of the year, of which there were more than usual, and talked about our prospects for the coming season, that would include D3 Playoffs and a possible move back to D2.
Fred then handed the mic. over to our coach, Mike Quinlan, who began to wax lyrical about how the team is more of a club and how that club is more of a community, and about how it takes a village….and some other stuff that nobody could follow. Several hours later (or so it seemed) he moved on to the main event, namely the three big awards, Most Improved, Biggest Contribution and MVP.
First up was Most Improved Player, which went to Tractor (aka Jason Henry) for pushing himself all season and raising his game to a new level. Those of you who remember Tractor as only having a good 20 minutes in him, will now be impressed to know that he is now good for 25 or 28 minutes. No, really, I kid. He stepped up big. Well deserved Tractor.
Next, the Biggest Contribution went to Ed Lutjens for playing the (only?) responsible adult all season. Ed was always on hand with clean kit, a trash bag for empties and a cooler full of cold ones. He gave a lot and asked for little in return. A model citizen.
MVP went to the quiet Afrikaner, Hannes Bouwer, who's nose for the line was reflected by his impressive try count this Fall, despite suffering a fractured elbow and missing the last three games. He was also one of the few people never to talk back to coach, which is something I'm sure he'll grow out of.
With the serious stuff out of the way, we moved on to the less serious awards, presented by that peerless comedy duo, Andy Nelson and Jimmy Hendricks.
First on the hit list was Tractor, who picked up the "Golden Sharpie" for his T.O. like moves and try zone celebrations. If he continues in T.O.'s footsteps, expect him to very shortly tell us how we all suck and then get suspended from the team.
Jeff Keating received a new set of crayons and a Winnie The Pooh book of colors to help him decipher the penalty plays. But don't worry Jeff, once you get the hang of them, we're sure to change them all again next year.
Next, Dean Hardy got a little help with his wardrobe, since he is soon to audition as the sixth Backstreet Boy. The drunken, Irish one, presumably.
Fred Hayman was presented with his own signed 8" x 10" glossy of the Seacoast Team, confirming his worst conspiracy theories about how the whole league was plotting against us all season. But as you know, Fred didn't take it lying down, and made himself a complete pain in the arse all year to any league officials he could get in contact with. Us against the world, right Fred?
Speaking of pains in the ares, Ed picked up his second award of the night when he received his proctology diploma for his emergency, on-field examination of an Old Gold player's prostate. "Slightly inflamed" was the diagnosis.
Insert your own arse joke here.
Yours truly received a newly created Nobel Prize for web literacy. So newly created in fact that they seem to have forgotten to mail the check for ten million Kronor. Tight Swedish gits!
Francis got his Oscar for recovering from so many apparently career ending injuries this season, and gave (mercifully) a very short acceptance speech.
Coach got his own bobble head doll, although I can't remember what that was for. It was funny though.
Jason Willey once again refused to relinquish his grip on the La-La Concussion Trophy. "Out of my cold dead hands!". Quite literally, possibly.
And last, but by now means least, we turned to the scriptures to read the prophecy that predicted the second coming of Carlos. We'll if there was anyone left who wasn't already going to hell before that, I think we've got you covered.
Whew, what a night, what a hangover. Thanks to all who made it out on the night, and sorry to all who missed it. Click on the picture above to see more shots from the night.
Attendance at the banquet is usually a good barometer of the club’s fortunes, and if this year’s numbers are anything to go by, then 2006 looks set fair, with plenty of new faces to bolster those old and wizened ones of year’s past.
In addition to all the merriment, there were speeches made and awards awarded, both serious and not so much. For those of you unable to attend, or just too drunk to remember any of it (Spyder), I’ll try to recap for you here.
President, Fred Hayman, kicked off the proceedings with a few choice words about the high points of the year, of which there were more than usual, and talked about our prospects for the coming season, that would include D3 Playoffs and a possible move back to D2.
Fred then handed the mic. over to our coach, Mike Quinlan, who began to wax lyrical about how the team is more of a club and how that club is more of a community, and about how it takes a village….and some other stuff that nobody could follow. Several hours later (or so it seemed) he moved on to the main event, namely the three big awards, Most Improved, Biggest Contribution and MVP.
First up was Most Improved Player, which went to Tractor (aka Jason Henry) for pushing himself all season and raising his game to a new level. Those of you who remember Tractor as only having a good 20 minutes in him, will now be impressed to know that he is now good for 25 or 28 minutes. No, really, I kid. He stepped up big. Well deserved Tractor.
Next, the Biggest Contribution went to Ed Lutjens for playing the (only?) responsible adult all season. Ed was always on hand with clean kit, a trash bag for empties and a cooler full of cold ones. He gave a lot and asked for little in return. A model citizen.
MVP went to the quiet Afrikaner, Hannes Bouwer, who's nose for the line was reflected by his impressive try count this Fall, despite suffering a fractured elbow and missing the last three games. He was also one of the few people never to talk back to coach, which is something I'm sure he'll grow out of.
With the serious stuff out of the way, we moved on to the less serious awards, presented by that peerless comedy duo, Andy Nelson and Jimmy Hendricks.
First on the hit list was Tractor, who picked up the "Golden Sharpie" for his T.O. like moves and try zone celebrations. If he continues in T.O.'s footsteps, expect him to very shortly tell us how we all suck and then get suspended from the team.
Jeff Keating received a new set of crayons and a Winnie The Pooh book of colors to help him decipher the penalty plays. But don't worry Jeff, once you get the hang of them, we're sure to change them all again next year.
Next, Dean Hardy got a little help with his wardrobe, since he is soon to audition as the sixth Backstreet Boy. The drunken, Irish one, presumably.
Fred Hayman was presented with his own signed 8" x 10" glossy of the Seacoast Team, confirming his worst conspiracy theories about how the whole league was plotting against us all season. But as you know, Fred didn't take it lying down, and made himself a complete pain in the arse all year to any league officials he could get in contact with. Us against the world, right Fred?
Speaking of pains in the ares, Ed picked up his second award of the night when he received his proctology diploma for his emergency, on-field examination of an Old Gold player's prostate. "Slightly inflamed" was the diagnosis.
Insert your own arse joke here.
Yours truly received a newly created Nobel Prize for web literacy. So newly created in fact that they seem to have forgotten to mail the check for ten million Kronor. Tight Swedish gits!
Francis got his Oscar for recovering from so many apparently career ending injuries this season, and gave (mercifully) a very short acceptance speech.
Coach got his own bobble head doll, although I can't remember what that was for. It was funny though.
Jason Willey once again refused to relinquish his grip on the La-La Concussion Trophy. "Out of my cold dead hands!". Quite literally, possibly.
And last, but by now means least, we turned to the scriptures to read the prophecy that predicted the second coming of Carlos. We'll if there was anyone left who wasn't already going to hell before that, I think we've got you covered.
Whew, what a night, what a hangover. Thanks to all who made it out on the night, and sorry to all who missed it. Click on the picture above to see more shots from the night.
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