Lads, apparently CIPP eligibility is going to be scrutinized more closely than ever this Fall, so if you are not already registered, you need to get on and do it now! It cost $25, and get's you a cool sticker and card. Here's the sorry list of who we have registered so far. Many of you claim to not remember if you registered in the Spring, so if your name is not on this list, your not registered - geddit? Here's the form - just fax it in with a credit card number and you're all set. If you prefer, just fax me your credit card, and I'll take care of it, and a few other things.

Many of you have still to show your face at practice. I don't get this. You must be in great shape already....

Well, I just witnessed the dismantiling of Team USA by mighty, mighty Puerto Rico. My encyclopedia tells me that Puerto Rico is "a self-governing, unincorporated, organized territory of the United States located in the northeast Caribbean". Puerto Rico was invaded by the U.S. in 1898, and they have pretty much run the show since then, although stopping short of annexing the country entirely and making it another state. Seems like it might be time to re-think that, since the only way to stop this from happening again will be to re-invade and take away all their basketballs of mass destruction. Peurto Rico, consider yourself on warning!

So it turns out that all that bling doesn't make you a better basketball player. I'm guessing that it has a bit more to do with practice. In that vein, practice for the fall season starts in earnest this Tuesday. So, like Lebron James, you can rely on your bling and your complete lack of activity over the summer, or like Carlos Arroyo you can work your butt off and pull off a few upsets this fall....

6:30 pm at Fox Street, unless you hear otherwise.

Practice tonight at the Fox, at half-past six. I got lots of stickers, so come on down.

In case you haven't heard, Leo has 2-3 extra tickets to next week's Patriots pre-season run around with the Eagles. 15 yard line, second row, third level, since you asked. Wot, no seat numbers? Like the stand-up guy that he is, he's only asking face value for these tickets, which is only $65. But wait...this also includes a ride down, but I'm guessing it will be in the Civic, not the Envoy.

Anyway, Leo loves to get lots of e-mail, so if you recon that face value is a little steep for these tickets, e-mail him here with your best offer. Or failing that you can just go round his house and watch the game on his 50" plasma set while he's not there.

August 3rd, on this day in history, about half an hour ago, I quit my craptacular job. So it's goodbye to that pride swallowing paycheck, and hopefully on to a better one. I feel a little bit guilty for all the time I spent in the bathroom playing Tetris on my phone. But they ought to be sorry for the eleven months of my life they stole. I'll never get those back.

In a similar vein, on this same day in 1914 Germany declared war on France, proving they're not all bad. But then they had to go and get everyone else involved and spoil it for the rest of us. 8.5 million deaths later and France was still there. Trust me, you're not alone in thinking it was all pretty pointless then. For the league table on other 20th century acts of human futility, click here. Dubya doesn't even make the Top 20.

In a completely different vein, August 3rd 1946 saw the foundation of the National Basketball Association by a bunch of short, white men. We all know how that ended up.

For a summary of the major issues in this year's political debate, check this out. Other than that, practice will be held again this Thursday at Fox Street. 6:30pm is the designated hour. There are just six weeks to our first game, so if you're not already doing something to get in shape, it's about time you started.

You don't have to be large to be the Alpha Male.

So let the list making begin. Alpha Males we all know and love:

James Bond (of course)
Maximus Decimus Meridius
Bambi's Dad
Lt. Col. Bill Kilgore (Apocolypse Now)
Henry Rollins
Gengis Khan
George Patten
Gordon, The Big Blue Engine
Yellowstone Wolf #195
Ernest Hemingway
Brett Favre
Batman

Who else you got? Let me know. E-mail or write it on the back of a twenty and mail it to me.

Still struggling to understand the concept of the Alpha Male?
Per dictionary.com it means: a domineering man; the dominant member in a group of males, especially animals.
Not sure if you really qualify? Take the test all the chimps are taking to figure it out.
Still not getting it? See this picture? You should be the dog with his tail in the air, while the other dog demonstrates a classic submissive position. This should resemble a typical day for you. That dog way in the background plays for Old Gold.