New Officers for 2009

The AGM has done its work, and coughed up a new(ish) batch of officers to steer the club on its unwavering course for the next 12 months. We've got something old, something new...well, mostly something old. But that just means more wisdom, right?

So here they are:
President - Jerry Alves
Treasurer - Ryan Facey
Secretary - Tom Lovering
Fixtures - Derik Hammond

Captain - Steve Stewart
Vice Captain - Alan Gibbon
Selectors - Scott Derrig, Jeff Keating

Recruitment - Fraser Boyd
Social Chair - Jason Henry
Fundraising - Dan, Calvin and Josh

So there you have it. With a team like that, what could possibly go wrong?

That was a rhetorical question.

The Banquet Is Upon Us

Rounding out the year like a well place exclamation point, the Annual Banquet has been scheduled for Saturday, November 22nd, at the Eagles Club in Portland.

Unlike last years premature gathering, this year's event has been scheduled at a more traditional hour, beginning at 6, and running through until 10. At which time you'll be free to continue the revelry as you see fit.

I've been informed that, uncharacteristically, some of you are clamoring for a PayPal button so you can pay in advance. Well, I'm game for a laugh, so, I've dusted off last year's untouched button and am prepared to give you the benefit of the doubt.

$25 per head gets you a hot meal (that's a $5 reduction over last year - who says the economy is in rough shape?). I think you're on your own for booze, although there will be a cash bar.

See you there.

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Amoskeag Warm Up Added

Well, the headline pretty much says it all. The first warm up game has been added to the schedule for August 23rd, away at Amoskeag. You probably could have figured that out from looking at the schedule over on the right, but it never hurts to beat you over the head with this kind of information.

Fall training begins to take shape...

For those of you who have been so far avoiding our Thursday night run-arounds because Tuesday is the only day you're allowed out of the house, mark down August 19th as the official start of Fall training for you.

Having said that though, Thursday seem destined to pick up in their intensity from now on, if the rumblings from the coach's corner are anything to be believed.

But anyway, I digress. The normal Tuesday and Thursday 6-8 p.m. schedule that you're used to will start up in earnest on the 19th, with a couple of warm up games lining up between then and the start of the league season. The only potential fly in the ointment at this point is the venue, because although Fox Street is intended as our firm Fall home, Maine Special Olympics has the field booked on the 19th and the 26th.

While there are those that might say you'd have a hard time distinguishing our training sessions from an event at the Maine Special Olympic, when they start handing you a medal for coming last, then you'll know you're at the wrong place.

So stay tuned for the ultimate location, but start polishing your boots in anticipation of the 19th. Of course if you want to make an earlier start, join us any regular Thursday night at Fox Street for a decent workout.

Summer Venue Announced

As promised, the club has been able to come up with a venue for Summer training, which will definitely have a familiar feel for some of our longer term inmates.

Yes, it's a oldie but a goodie, as training recommences at Fox Street Field on Thursday nights from 6:30 to 8 pm (starting this Thursday, 6/5). While some of us owe our degenerative arthritis to the many years on the "old" Fox Street, it has become more of a verdant pasture of late, which explains why we haven't played on it for years. Normally the City reserves its best fields for the lacrosse playing children of taxpayers who probably don't even live in town, but by special consent we have been allowed back on for these summer sessions.

Either Mr. Winch has us posing as a co-ed kickball team, or the kids have already destroyed it and it's well on it's way back to becoming the weed-strewn parking lot it always was.

Directions below.

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Summer Training Schedule Begins

After a tough weekend, in which Portland came up a little short in the NERFU Final against Burlington, the management has blessed us all with a couple of weeks off. After that training moves to a slightly more relaxed once-a-week schedule for the summer.

That once-a-week is more than likely to be Thursday, but the exact venue and time have yet to be determined, so keep an eye open here or on the message board for the exact details.

Enjoy the break.

Practice Moves Outside

Tired of all that fake green stuff we've been training (and rubbing our skin off) on?

In which case you can now look forward to kicking your heels up on some of the real stuff. Or rather, some frozen remnants of the real stuff that have recently emerged from the retreating ice shelf.

Beginning this Tuesday (April 8th), practice will be held at Payson Park from 6pm, until it gets dark, or starts snowing. We'll also be doing the same on Thursdays, 6pm until the witching hour.

Nubz can peep the directions to the Payce below.

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40th Anniversary Tour Announced, San Diego exodus begins

Yes Indeed, Portland Rugby Club has defied the odds and made it (or looks set to make it) to the ripe old age of 40. And just like your typical aging hipster it's having a mid-life crisis and taking itself out West to go find itself amidst the palms and sea breezes of San Diego. And guess what? You're invited.

Yep, if you've ever played for Portland (or wished you could), clear your diary from the 18th to the 23rd of February, 2009, 'cos you could be living it up in the always-72-degrees Californian paradise, or if you've got the stomach for it, in nearby Tijuana, which is just a stone's throw away.

Current costs are estimated to be around $750 per person, and that gets you one Old Boys game (if you qualify), one A Side game (if you've got the chops for it) and a visit to watch the IRB Sevens at Petco Park - and that's just the scheduled activities. No doubt there will be countless nights of debauchery in the Gasslamp District or anywhere else you can persuade a taxi to take you.

At the time of writing that's just 332 days until we leave, and that means just about $2 a day you have to save, so get on it. More details will emerge as we get closer to the event, but in the mean time you can ask your questions, make any suggestions or signal your intention to participate through the contact section of the website. This will all get forwarded along to Evan and Andy who are the masterminds behind the plan.

See you there!

Home Opener

Portland kick's off their Spring season tomorrow with a game against Amoskeag at Fitzpatrick Stadium.

Given the heavy demand for artificial fields at this time of year the kick off is a little earlier than normal, with the start set for 11am. Be there early to get a good seat.

Directions below:

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Tuesday training will now be on Wednesday

There's not too much more to add. It's all still at Howard Sports, at the same time, but now with added Wednesday.
Thursday practice remains the same, on Thursday.

Training at Gorham Sports this Saturday (3/15)

After weeks of bouncing around in the confines of Howard Sports, the wide-open greenery of Gorham Sports Center beckons tomorrow, where a pitch has been laid on for you from 2:30 to 4pm so you can stretch your legs.

Because I know you're going to ask, I've already provided you with a nice map below so you know how to get there. So that's one less excuse you can use. I'm sure your overactive imagination can come up with plenty of others.


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Dr. Phil says your couch and your fat arse should see less of each other

Yes, that's right, even Oprah's heavy-handed head shrinker can see that the relationship you've developed with your couch has become unhealthy.

I hate to be the one to break this to you, but your couch wants to start seeing other people. Other, erm...slimmer people.

Sure, I understand that this is all probably a lot to take in right now. Take your time with it. Breath.

I know that you though things had been going really well between you and your favorite piece of upholstered loveliness, but really, can't you see how all those chips and cookie crumbs took their toll on her?

And those dents. Man, those dents. It just makes me shudder thinking about it.

That just isn't healthy for either of you.

But hey...come on. Stop crying. You've got to pull yourself together if you're going to win her back. Hell, you don't even want that piece of trash back anyway. A good looking guy like you should be shopping at Pottery Barn, if you know what I mean.

This time it's going to be different though, right? No more 12-hour Mountain Dew fueled binges playing Halo. Sure, you thought you were happy at the time, but look what its done to both of you. Fragging n00bs loses its lustre after a while and all you're left with is a sore thumb and pile of returnables.

We've all been there man. Nobody's going to judge you. C'mon....wipe those eyes, and get yourself back in the kind of shape that looks good on a couch again.

You can make a start any Tuesday or Thursday at Howard Sports. 6:30 for 6:45 on Tuesday, 6:45 for 7 on Thursday.

Trust me. You'll be feeling better about yourself in no time.

And hey, this Saturday afternoon, since you're going to be free from now on, get to Bates College for some more indoor turf time. I'll hit you up with the deets later in the week.

It's time to be a man again.

"Spring" Training

If you've just been growing wider on the couch it's time to have someone pry you off it and push you out the door in the direction of Howard Sports. Yes, that's right, what we jokingly refer to as "Spring Training" is starting up next week (2/5), despite the fact that a green blade of grass may not appear in the state for several more months.

In one of his first acts as President, Jerry has been able to secure us twice-weekly sessions indoors at Howard Sports in Saco, one in gym and one on turf, so there's opportunity to hone your skills as well as your chiseled physique. Specifics on the times etc. are republished below as well as a map with directions at the very bottom.

Tuesday Practices:
Location: Howard Sports in Saco, Gymnasium #2
Time: 6:45 pm to 8:30 pm
Everyone is expected to be fully kitted-up and ready to practice by 6:45 pm so we make the most of our allotted time. Don't show up late in hopes of trying to miss the fitness portion of the training, we all need to be fit to repeat NERFU.
Cost: $5 dollars a person to be collected pre-practice.
Because this is a gymnasium ensure that you have the proper footwear for practice "sneakers".

Thursday Practices:
Location: Howard Sports in Saco, Small Turf
Time: 6:45 pm to 8:00 pm
Everyone is expected to be fully kitted-up and ready to practice by 6:45 pm, being on time on Thursday is critical because we have less time at the facility.
Cost: $5 dollars a person to be collected pre-practice
Because this is turf ensure that you have the proper footwear for practice "sneakers, cleats and or turf shoes".


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New Management

At the second time of asking the club managed to muster up enough of the faithful to stage a passable AGM and determine just who is going to be running the show for the next 12 months.
Business both old and new was kept to a minimum in order to focus on the elections before the elusive majority that had assembled should disappear for fear of getting elected to something. As usual however some wringing of hands took place regarding the club finances, and the need for new and lucrative get rich schemes.

Anyway, it's just those kind of "as usual" comments that the populous has had enough of since they were in the mood for some change, and who can blame them? Throw the rascals out, I say. Whether any of the rascals could've been persuaded to stay is another matter.

The most hotly contested race of the evening was that of Captain, and after a healthy debate, Steve Stewart became the choice of the people to guide the club in its on-field activities.

Backing Steve up off the field, with 25 years experience and plenty of persuasive power, was Jerry Alves, who was elected as President.

Rounding out the Exec., and making up in enthusiasm for what they may lack in experience, were Ryan Facey and Derik Hammond at the positions of Treasurer and Secretary respectively.

Congratulations to all the new officers. May their coffers runeth over, their fixture lists be full, and their days (and nights) be free from drama and intrigue. Good luck with that last one. This is Portland after all.

News of winter training plans should be issuing forth from the new team very shortly. Watch this space....