Does it take a good 30 minutes before you can move around normally in the morning?
Is rock music crap these days?
Do hot high school girls call you "Sir" or "Mister"?
Do you care about what beer you're drinking?
Do you have children of your own (that live with you, and actually call you "Dad")?
Has it turned out that your wife or significant other doesn't actually like rugby?
If you answered "Yes" to two or more of these questions, then this means your are probably an "Old Boy". As such, this probably also means that when you're not stressing about work and the mortgage, your only source of joy (other than hot high school girls) is reminiscing about all those great games of rugby you once played.
Once you were an athlete. A marauding, take-no-prisoners alpha male....and inside you know that you still are.
Well, I have some good news for you. Here at the PRFC laboratories we have developed a time machine capable of transporting you back to those halcyon days when you could play two games, drink all night and still get up by Sunday lunchtime to go out drinking again. Code named "bus trip", this top secret project has breathed new life in to many former players who had previously been devoid of any life signs. Created with copious amounts of alcohol, a house band and even the odd high school girl, this device is guaranteed to transform you in to that beer swilling party animal that you once were - at least for a few shining moments. Of course, once you step outside the aura of the "bus trip", gravity and time take hold again, and the girls go back to calling you "sir".
"Where can I get me some of this 'bus trip'?" I can hear you all yelling. Well hold on there old timer, watch your blood pressure. It just so happens that a fresh shipment of "bus trip" is scheduled to arrive on October 22nd to coincide with an Old Boys game to be played under the lights in Amesbury, MA. In order to accomodate your busy weekend "honey do" list, the "bus trip" will not be administered until 1:30pm, with KO scheduled for approx. 6:30pm, after the A Game.
If you would like to get a prescription for a dose of "bus trip", please e-mail Mike DeSalle or Leo Caouette and let them know about your particular symptoms.
If by chance you are the partner of an "Old Boy" who has stumbled across this post, I want you to look deep in to my eyes and concentrate on the sound of my voice. When I count to three you are going to have no recollection of "bus trip", high school girls or alcohol. In fact, you've been wanting your man to have "a little guy time" lately, and feel he should get out by himself more. While he's gone you're going to go to Victoria's Secret and spend a lot of (your own) money. Three, two, one....you're under.....
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Thursday, September 29, 2005
Directions to Women's Match
Jes asked me to post these directions to Moakley Park in Boston, and she told me that kick off is at 2pm. I'm guessing that that's on Saturday, but I can't guess who the match is against, since there's a lot of teams who use that field. Anyway, if you want to know, I'm sure Jes will tell you. Good luck to everyone who's playing.
From the West:
Take the Mass Pike East To 93 South
Take 93 South to Exit 15 (COLUMBIA ROAD)
Take left at the end of the ramp onto COLUMBIA RD
toward J.F.K. LIBRARY.
Enter roundabout(Rotary) and take 2nd exit onto
WILLIAM J DAY BLVD.
Field is up on your left, park in the beach parking
lots on your right.
From the South:
Take 93 North to Exit 15 (Columbia Rd.).
Take a right at the end of the ramp onto COLUMBIA RD
toward J.F.K. LIBRARY.
Enter roundabout(Rotary) and take 2nd exit onto
WILLIAM J DAY BLVD.
Field is up on your left, park in the beach parking
lots on your right.
From the North:
Take 93 South through the city to Exit 15 (Columbia
Rd.).
Take a left at the end of the ramp onto COLUMBIA RD
toward J.F.K. LIBRARY.
Enter roundabout(Rotary) and take 2nd exit onto
WILLIAM J DAY BLVD.
Field is up on your left, park in the beach parking
lots on your right.
Here's a map.
From the West:
Take the Mass Pike East To 93 South
Take 93 South to Exit 15 (COLUMBIA ROAD)
Take left at the end of the ramp onto COLUMBIA RD
toward J.F.K. LIBRARY.
Enter roundabout(Rotary) and take 2nd exit onto
WILLIAM J DAY BLVD.
Field is up on your left, park in the beach parking
lots on your right.
From the South:
Take 93 North to Exit 15 (Columbia Rd.).
Take a right at the end of the ramp onto COLUMBIA RD
toward J.F.K. LIBRARY.
Enter roundabout(Rotary) and take 2nd exit onto
WILLIAM J DAY BLVD.
Field is up on your left, park in the beach parking
lots on your right.
From the North:
Take 93 South through the city to Exit 15 (Columbia
Rd.).
Take a left at the end of the ramp onto COLUMBIA RD
toward J.F.K. LIBRARY.
Enter roundabout(Rotary) and take 2nd exit onto
WILLIAM J DAY BLVD.
Field is up on your left, park in the beach parking
lots on your right.
Here's a map.
Monday, September 26, 2005
"Go back to D2"
…so spoke the Rutland captain at the drink up after last Saturday’s resounding victory. Well, yes, we fully intend to, and after this performance Portland has every reason to feel optimistic about their chances of doing so. There is of course the small matter of winning the rest of our games, then the playoffs etc. and then receiving the blessings of the NERFU politburo… But, as they say at FEMA, “baby steps”.
Portland were always going to be the better looking side in their new kit, but in rugby the clothes do not maketh the man, so it was going to take a bit more than shiny shirts to see off the Rutland side.
The early going was not particularly pretty with several Portland players growing wide-eyed at the site of the try line, only to be cut down short, leaving exasperated players open outside them. Soon however the home team settled in to doing what it does best – driving mauls and pushover tries. The first score came inevitably from a 5-meter lineout, with Hannes scoring the first of his four tries of the day. Given that most of these type of scores come pretty close to the touch line, Andy Nelson had his work cut out for him on the conversions all day. Despite many good efforts he finished with just 4 out of 10 attempts, plus one penalty.
The exact sequence of the tries has already been lost to history, for despite all of those people on the touchline, still nobody bothers to write anything down. Anyway, what I do remember from the first half is a breakaway try for Matt Winch, vindicating the banana defense, another score for Hannes from a set penalty (more props to coach) and probably at least one more pushover try.
The second half continued in much the same vein, although as the score increased, many of the Portland players eschewed hard work in favor of glory, standing off from rucks and watching loose ball bobble around rather than getting their hands dirty cleaning it up. In the end this belief that “someone else will take care of it” took its toll as Rutland scored after several botched attempts to clear our own lines.
Nevertheless, that was the only time that Rutland troubled the score keepers (that’s obviously a metaphor, since I already pointed out that there were no bloody score keepers), with the game finishing at 61-7 in Portland’s favor. The home side scored ten tries in all, with four to Hannes, one to Matt and one to Scott Derrig, who this time capped another solo effort with a more modest one handed touch down. I managed to trundle over for another score (no, I’m not still bitter about that comment), so that still leaves another four tries unaccounted for. If I’ve left you out, please be sure to let me know so I can post a retraction, hire a skywriter or something like that.
A side man-of-the-match honors went to Scott Derrig, who definitely punched above his weight downing his drinks. Other notable performances from my perspective include Fred Hayman for breaking so many tackles in his new shirt, Jeff Keating for his first half hustle (I’ve still got his cleat marks on my back to prove it) and of course to all forwards everywhere, because you’re my boys.
The B game proved to be brief but eventful as it broke out into a (good natured?) feud between Tractor and Francis. I believe that Tractor may have edged that one after scoring his own breakaway try and capping it with some try-zone shenanigans that would have made Terrell Owens blush (wot, no Sharpie?). Last I heard, Francis had decided to bypass the drink up to work on his appeal to NERFU.
Portland have a bye on 10/1 and then host Wolfhounds-C on 10/8. See you all there.
Portland were always going to be the better looking side in their new kit, but in rugby the clothes do not maketh the man, so it was going to take a bit more than shiny shirts to see off the Rutland side.
The early going was not particularly pretty with several Portland players growing wide-eyed at the site of the try line, only to be cut down short, leaving exasperated players open outside them. Soon however the home team settled in to doing what it does best – driving mauls and pushover tries. The first score came inevitably from a 5-meter lineout, with Hannes scoring the first of his four tries of the day. Given that most of these type of scores come pretty close to the touch line, Andy Nelson had his work cut out for him on the conversions all day. Despite many good efforts he finished with just 4 out of 10 attempts, plus one penalty.
The exact sequence of the tries has already been lost to history, for despite all of those people on the touchline, still nobody bothers to write anything down. Anyway, what I do remember from the first half is a breakaway try for Matt Winch, vindicating the banana defense, another score for Hannes from a set penalty (more props to coach) and probably at least one more pushover try.
The second half continued in much the same vein, although as the score increased, many of the Portland players eschewed hard work in favor of glory, standing off from rucks and watching loose ball bobble around rather than getting their hands dirty cleaning it up. In the end this belief that “someone else will take care of it” took its toll as Rutland scored after several botched attempts to clear our own lines.
Nevertheless, that was the only time that Rutland troubled the score keepers (that’s obviously a metaphor, since I already pointed out that there were no bloody score keepers), with the game finishing at 61-7 in Portland’s favor. The home side scored ten tries in all, with four to Hannes, one to Matt and one to Scott Derrig, who this time capped another solo effort with a more modest one handed touch down. I managed to trundle over for another score (no, I’m not still bitter about that comment), so that still leaves another four tries unaccounted for. If I’ve left you out, please be sure to let me know so I can post a retraction, hire a skywriter or something like that.
A side man-of-the-match honors went to Scott Derrig, who definitely punched above his weight downing his drinks. Other notable performances from my perspective include Fred Hayman for breaking so many tackles in his new shirt, Jeff Keating for his first half hustle (I’ve still got his cleat marks on my back to prove it) and of course to all forwards everywhere, because you’re my boys.
The B game proved to be brief but eventful as it broke out into a (good natured?) feud between Tractor and Francis. I believe that Tractor may have edged that one after scoring his own breakaway try and capping it with some try-zone shenanigans that would have made Terrell Owens blush (wot, no Sharpie?). Last I heard, Francis had decided to bypass the drink up to work on his appeal to NERFU.
Portland have a bye on 10/1 and then host Wolfhounds-C on 10/8. See you all there.
Sunday, September 25, 2005
Pay for your new jersey
For those of you who gave me an order for a new jersey yesterday, hopefully you have some recollection of the event, since they are now on order, and will be winging their way towards us in 3 to 4 weeks.
That means you have between now and then to pay up so that the club isn't left hanging. Why not get it out of the way now by clicking on the button below? That'll save us the trouble of turning you over to our collections department.
If you didn't get a chance to give me an order yesterday, drop me a line with your desired size and the number you'd like on the back and I'll start a new order. Assuming that your willing to part with $40 of course.
That means you have between now and then to pay up so that the club isn't left hanging. Why not get it out of the way now by clicking on the button below? That'll save us the trouble of turning you over to our collections department.
If you didn't get a chance to give me an order yesterday, drop me a line with your desired size and the number you'd like on the back and I'll start a new order. Assuming that your willing to part with $40 of course.
Friday, September 23, 2005
Home Opener
It’s finally upon us. Your Portland team is back from its travels, sporting a 2-0 record and bringing back stories of close escapes and conquests both on and off the field. Now they return home to that temple of rugby, Fox Street, looking to continue their good form against a gritty Rutland team, who finished points leaders of D3 last year.
The weather promises to be as bright and shiny as Portland’s new jerseys, encouraging running rugby and flowing beer. If you don’t already have plans to play, think about coming down to watch and give our lads a cheer. I’m sure that some of you are reading this and feeling guilty about your complete absence from games or training to this point, but don’t let that keep you away. Just confess your sins before our Truth and Reconciliation Committee and all will be forgiven my son.
Everyone is welcome, especially those of you bringing a cooler. Kick Off is 1pm.
Thursday, September 22, 2005
Late change - Training @ Fox Street 9/22
Parks & Rec screwed us over so training for tonight with be at Fox Street. Given the failing light, be there as early as you can to get warm and get on with things. If you're reading this message before practice, call someone else and make sure they know.
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